A Man and His House

A Man and His House.

A man once had a house. It was built on a sure foundation, and was decorated with the finest of things. The man was happy. Sure, there were cracks in the walls, the doors creaked open and shut, this house didn't have a lot of the commodities that other homes of similar shape and size may have had. It was not perfect in the eyes of the world, but in the eyes of the man, it was greater than anything he could have dreamt of. The home he grew up in was good, but not as good as this one, and he was excited to call it his own. The rooms still needed to be painted and the laundry needed to be done. The man, although excited about the purchase of his dream home, was not prepared for the effort it would take to upkeep the home. He felt like he could handle it, but would often push off necessary maintencance until he would have "time or energy to do it." What the man didn’t know was that there was a problem. A big problem. There was black mold all throughout this home. There wasn’t mold when the man first purchased the home. Slowly but surely, from neglect of the house, it had crept in and taken hold upon the house. The man should not have been surprised, because he had seen patches here and there, and had neglected to take care of it. The man thought he was too busy, and reduced the problem in his head. Before he knew it, the mold had spread and it was starting to poison his precious young family. After a thorough assessment of the house, it was determined that this house needed to be condemned. The mold had spread into virtually every part of the home. The effort and cost to clean it would be insurmountable. The logical course of action would be to abandon the home. The man was scared. It felt like just yesterday he and his young family had moved into this home and now he was going to lose it. To lose his home would mean to lose everything he had ever worked for and dreamt of. The man didn't know what to do. He did not know anything about mold or how to get rid of it. So he turned to the one who would never lie to him, and would tell him the truth, even if it was hard to hear. He asked his God to see what he should do. After praying, the man received an answer that he should be diligent in the cleaning of the mold. The man was not to abandon the home under any condition unless God told him to otherwise. The man had received an answer. Regardless of how much it would cost, how long it would take, or effort it required, the man knew it would be worth it because God told him it would be. He knew God could not lie.

 

The man loved that house. It wasn't perfect, and in due time the man had grand expectations to improve upon the house with more amenities and features. Bigger rooms, brighter lighting, warmer colors just to list a few. The man loved the house for all it had been for his family in the past. This home had been a shelter from the storms. This home had kept his family warm in the winter, and the man’s family had once felt safe there. The man didn't just love the home more for what it was, but for what it could have become. The man disagreed with insurance adjusters that told him the home was beyond repair. The man told them he would clean the black mold himself, for it was his own fault the mold took root in the first place. He went to the store and asked what he would need to clean the mold. The salesman told him that it would require very expensive tools and materials and he would need to use the chemicals of a very harsh and stringent nature. The salesman warned that the man’s eyes would burn, his arms would ache, and he would be financially drained if he chose to undertake this task. Knowing how much the house meant to him, and remembering the answer he received from God, the man turned over his credit card and charged the supplies without hesitation.

 

The salesman was not kidding. The man’s eyes and lungs burned more than he could have imagined. He was perpetually exhausted. He worked on it for months, cleaning the basement first, then under the stairs, then under the sinks. Night after night the man would get home from his strenuous job and then he would clean late into the night. Often, the man would clean until the sun was coming up. This continued on for days. Then the days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months.

 

The man’s wife and children could not stay in the house and wouldn't even visit for fear that the filth and poisonous mold would harm them. They escaped to a house where they felt they could be safe and happy. The man’s dear wife could not understand why he cared so much about this house. He tried his best to explain to her what the house had meant to him. He tried to tell her how much he cared about the house. He reminded her of when it came down to make a decision to buy the house, that the man had prayed about it and received an answer that this house, although not perfect, was the house he was meant to buy. The man sold all he had, took out a large loan, and spent every last penny he had to buy it. When the purchase was finalized, he felt happy and complete for the first time in his life. That home was the greatest treasure that he ever possessed. The man did his best to apologize for not taking better care of the house. Only now could he see where he had been neglectful and lazy. He now recognized how countless days he had left the cleaning duties and daily house maintenance to his wife to perform, claiming he was too busy, or too tired. She couldn't keep up with all the duties of the house by herself. She had asked the man numerous times to help her, and he refused. He couldn't see the mold like she could, and what he did see, he would minimize the problem and then procrastinate. She had, too many times, borne the brunt of the workload solely on her own, while the man would sit and watch ignorantly. The man told her how he had seen the error of his ways. He wanted to be better. He had been actively cleaning every day. The man finally saw the amount of effort she had put into the house, and it had not been easy. He had been improving upon the house as much as he could. The man regretted ever letting the house get so bad, but knew that it was getting better. The endeavor to get rid of the mold was a long process, but it was getting better and better with each passing day.

 

But it was too late. The man’s wife had already experienced what it was like to live in a home that was free of mold. She felt safe and happy. She no longer needed to work to clean the mold, and could spend more time enjoying her new home. She just could not see how the man’s home could ever be fully clean. The man’s children were happy where they were. Of course, they were young and couldn't see the difference in where they lived, but they were happy nonetheless. The man’s wife thought, “why bother going through all the trouble to clean the man’s home, when there is a beautiful and clean new home for her and the kids?” The efforts required to clean the man’s house were too great, and seemed impossible to her. This dialogue between the two went on for months, until one day, the man was finally able to convince her to come to the house and see the progress he had made. The man knew the work was not completed and there was still plenty to be done. But the place looked wonderful by comparison to what it had been when she fled with the kids. The man knew that if he could just get her to see the house, and how much better it was, she might still be convinced to return. Finally, the opportunity came. The man walked her through the home, showing her what his many hours of labor had yielded. She was amazed. She hugged the man and said she could see eventually coming back with the kids. The man was so full of joy that he started to cry. “Finally”, the man thought, “my works have paid off and soon our life would be back to normal. But not to where our life had been, but to somewhere far better!” The man had found a new sense of resolve and commitment to the home. The man and his wife reminiscenced about the good times they had there. They both admitted that there were a lot of bad times too, but that things would be better from then on. The man could see it in his wife’s eyes that this was the first step to reuniting their family. She had to get back to the kids, and the man still had plenty of work to do. After hours of diligently cleaning, the man rested well that night in the confidence that the future was now brighter because of what he saw in his precious wife’s eyes. He went to bed that night finally feeling good, that all his work had actually some purpose and meaning.

 

The next morning the man called his wife to thank her for coming over. But something was wrong. He sensed something different in her voice. She told him that she had not been honest with him. She had just felt bad that the man had been working so hard on the house that she had told him that it looked better than it really did. She expressed her concerns that she didn't feel that the house would ever been fully clean, or that she would ever want to live there again. The man’s heart sank and he became physically sick as she described how she felt. As she spoke, the man wondered to himself, “What happened in that time between her visiting the house and her going back to the kids? Was what I saw in her eyes really the joy and happiness I thought I saw? Or was I simply kidding myself, hoping for something that was just not there?” She continued to tell the man that if he truly loved her and the kids, he would not ask her to come back to the house again. She said she needed to live in her new home for a while, possibly even forever. The man was defeated. He could not do anything more to convince her that the house was worth it and he would make it a home again. He begged her to know that their home was a place she could indeed be happy and safe, somewhere they could be together as a family once more. But the man's wife had already made up her mind. This was the end. He hung up the phone and sobbed.

 

How was it that God had told the man that buying this home was what He wanted the man to do, and then to tell him further that it would be worth it to clean the home and not just abandon it, only to have his family never return? What was the point? Why would God have the man go through all that effort, seemingly, for nothing?

 

To this day, the man is still confused as to why God allowed for this to happen. He sometimes loses sight of why he continues to clean, and sometimes stops trying. This never lasts long though, because cleaning has now just become a part of him. To stop cleaning feels wrong now. The man has been doing it for so long that doing anything else seems meaningless. The man knows that what he felt at both times that he prayed about the house. The first time, kneeling by his bedside in the small 1 bedroom apartment he was living in trying to decide what the next big step in his life would be. And the second, by going to the temple which God had told him to visit. The temple is the epitome of cleanliness and architecture. When he was in the temple, the man was able to see the mastery of craftsmanship in every detail of that place. Above all else, the temple was perfectly clean. The man knew that he wanted his home to be like that. And when praying about whether it was worth it to clean the house or to simply move out and abandon it, the man felt an overwhelming answer that someday, and sometime, his wife and kids would return to that home and the family would be whole again. To this day, the man continues to hold onto that hope. The man still hurts when he remembers that his wife didn’t want to come back, especially after seeing the look on her face and feeling the warmth of her embrace. But he continues to try. The man will never forget how he felt when speaking to his God, and will never forget in whom he has trusted. He knows that the Lord will not lie. The man bought this house for his family to fill it and by the grace of God, he will continue to clean it, improve upon it, and build it everyday until it can be filled again with the love than only a loving and united family can bring.

 

Like the man in the story above, we all suffer from some sort of mold in our lives. Sometimes we know why, and sometimes we may not. Either way, it is important to remember that no house is “condemned”. No house is “beyond repair”. A verse from the Book of Mormon states:
2 And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men.
3 And it came to pass that after they had spoken these words the Spirit of the Lord came upon them, and they were filled with joy, having received a remission of their sins, and having peace of conscience, because of the exceeding faith which they had in Jesus Christ who should come, according to the words which king Benjamin had spoken unto them.
We can become clean, we can become whole. Even if it’s a tornado that has turned our house upside down, we can fix anything with the help of the right people, tools and chemicals. The “right person” is Jesus Christ, the “tool” is repentance, and the “chemical” is the Atonement. Sometimes we feel too ashamed to seek out our Savior. Sometimes we think that repentance is beyond us. And sometimes we think that the Atonement is for everyone else but not for ourselves. I want to testify that I know these principles are true for I have exercised them in my own life. I am thankful for the Savior and everything he has done for me and for everyone. No matter how destitute our lives or “homes” may have become, we can be whole again. It may take a lot of work and effort and it may take the rest of our lives, but we can become clean and whole again through Him